Meaning of Life

“The Meaning of Life and The Meaning in Life”

The meaning of life is forever a mystery. Some mysteries are unsolvable and best left that way. But the meaning in life is entirely different. Life is not a problem needing a solution; it is an experience to be lived fully in the present, moment by moment. Meaning is not built into the actions, events, or outcomes you encounter in your life. On the contrary, you bestow meaning upon them as an act of your Soul Freedom. In this sense, something is only as important as you determine it to be. Because experience is so subjective, it is primarily your beliefs and emotions that determine how you bestow meaning. Different people attach different meanings to the same thing.

You bestow the meaning in life.

When people forget that the meaning they bestow upon something has real significance only for themselves, the result can be conflict not only on a grand scale but also in basic, everyday events. You might recognize these situations from your own relationship.

One of you stresses that it is essential to be early for appointments because being early means you are conscientious and thoughtful.

The other prefers to arrive just as activities are getting underway because being early means you are uptight and trying to be in control.

One of you wants to spend money on a new luxury SUV because showing your affluence means you are successful.

The other prefers to buy a standard model vehicle because showing your affluence means you are materialistic and competitive.

Fortunately, beliefs and emotions are open to change, and by simply remembering that things mean what you determine them to mean, you and your partner don’t have to choose one way or the other. You could agree to disagree and come to a solution not based primarily on a need to be right or for you both to share a single point of view. You can create new ways from two ways.

Choose faith and take action.

Knowing that you bestow meaning enables you to elevate the simplest facets of your relationship to moments of great power and beauty. Examples:

giving meaning to your relationship by making it the most important thing
regarding your relationship as a spiritual practice
elevating your sex to sacred loving
transforming ordinary activities such as bathing, preparing and eating food, dancing, and touching into ceremonial and ritualized behaviors
treating every moment as a meditation.


Excerpted from the book Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms of Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, Llewellyn, 2007

Al Link and Pala Copeland own and operate 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra. They regularly host lover’s romantic weekends near Ottawa Canada, and weeklong retreats in exotic locations. For more info Visit and their blog or send email:

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